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Frank Zappa - Uncle Bernie's Farm lyrics
----- -------- ---- (I'm dreaming...) There's a bomb to blow yo mommy up, A bomb for yo daddy too! (Ouch!) A baby doll that burps 'n pees; A case of airplane glue! There's a hungry plastic troll, To scarf yo buddy's arm! There's a box of ugly plastic things marked: "UNCLE BERNIE'S FARM" There's a little plastic 'CONGRESS' There's a 'NATION' you can buy! There's a doll that looks like mommy (She'll do anything but cry) (Yes, Sir) There's a doll that looks like daddy (He's a funny little man... Push a button 'n ask fo money: There's a dollar in his hand!) (Check his wallet) We gotta send Sanny claus back to de Rescue Mission! Christmas don't make it no more! Don'tcha know that murder an' destruction Scream de toys in every store! (I think this is sold in New York) There's a man who runs the country There's a man who tried to think And they're all made out of plastic (When they melt, they start to stink) There's a book with smiling children, Nearly dead with Christmas joys And smiling in his office is the creep who makes 'the toys' (They got this car, when it hits the wall, you can see the guy dying You got little plastic pools of blood Ho-Ho-Ho-Ho-Ho (I'm dreaming...) ...intestines...you can see right into his stomach... There's this other thing, I... I got bombs, I got rockets, I got a, I got a stillson wrench and comes with a tape recorder... I got plastic brass knuckles with sound effects We got a '39 Chevy |
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